Criticism can be a tough pill to swallow, especially when coming from someone who is close to you. It is very easy for a person to feel insulted or even depressed as a result of receiving a bit of criticism. Respoinding non-defensively to criticism is also a very tough task.

Rather than wallow in self-pity, take that criticism and turn it into a weapon – one that will help improve rather than destroy your self-esteem.

Here are a few techniques to help turn that criticism into something positive:

* Professionally, we receive criticism on a regular basis. The criticism usually comes from our bosses, but it can come from co-workers too. Generally, the criticism is meant to be constructive, to help us to become better workers, even if it may not feel that way.

Make a note of the complaint and take steps to fix your errors. If you are not sure how to go about bettering yourself at work, ask a superior. Our bosses are there to help us succeed and should be willing to help us attain the next level.

* We also receive criticism from blunt but well-meaning family members. In this case, decipher the criticism that is being given. Is it ill-mannered and meant to hurt you in a fit of spite or jealousy? Or is it casually pointed out as a piece of advice given to help you? We as people are quick to take offense to comments that are not meant in such a manner.

If the comment is meant to hurt you, shake it off. If it is designed as a piece of advice on how to improve, take it to heart and then take a good look in the mirror. Is the criticism true? If so, work on it, learn from it and then forget about it.

* The worst kind of criticism to bear can be the kind that is given by people who do not know you. If someone does not know you, it should not be possible to dish out criticism, right? Wrong – who better than a stranger to offer you a completely objective point of view that is not clouded by emotion. While this kind of criticism can be harder to handle, it can also offer the most insight.

Criticism may be hard to hear but if taken in the right context, it can be a powerful learning tool for business and life. We all have areas that we could use improvement. What better time to succeed than to take criticism and better yourself?

Using criticism to change yourself for the better will only result in a more confident person who is willing to gear up and face the challenges ahead. So next time you receive a bit of criticism, consider the source, and then turn it into a weapon aimed at improving your self-worth.

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As a business entrepreneur you now have two major responsibilities, and hopefully two major passions, in your life. Your marriage and your business. This is a wonderful thing, one most only dream of having, yet at the same time these two passions can come into conflict. It’s about balance, priorities, and paying attention. Here are a few steps to build a business while keeping your marriage happy.

Tip #1 Schedule and plan, plan and schedule. Sounds a bit obsessive and boring, right? Yet, the key to success is being able to live and be in the moment. You want to be thinking about your spouse when you’re spending time with them, not thinking about all the things on your todo list, and vice versa.

When you’re working on your business, you want to be 100% focused. Focus also means more productivity and efficiency. So how do you accomplish this “living in the moment”? Plan your day, week and month. Schedule time to work and time to be with your spouse or partner.

A good time management system and a solid business plan will help you stay on task and plan your day. Yes surprises will come up, however they’ll be significantly reduced if you’re on top of your goals and the steps you need to achieve them.

Tim #2 Create special time just for you and your spouse every day. Quality time is important. It doesn’t need to be a romantic candle lit dinner for two, but when you’re with your partner, be only with them. This means setting aside all other thoughts and worries and focusing on the single most important person in your life. But do take time every once in a while for a romantic candle lit dinner for two as well. ;)

Tip #3 Communicate. One of the biggest hurdles when you’re starting and growing your own business is that your spouse may wonder what you’re up to. They want to hear about your successes, your concerns, your winning moments and the problems in your day. Talk about what’s going on with you and your business. Just be sure to remember to talk about other things too and listen to your spouse talk about their day too.

A concern that often comes up is that the business owner doesn’t think the spouse understands what they’re talking about, so they decide to not talk about it at all. BIG mistake. Your spouse likely doesn’t understand everything, but the desire to understand is most likely there. Don’t ever assume that they don’t care or understand.

Tip #4 Find an outlet that isn’t your spouse. If you’re building a work from home business, you can feel cut off from the rest of the world. The moment your spouse walks in the door – whoosh! You’re suddenly connected to a real, live human being. You can begin to feel needy for that connection. Make sure to make connections with other real live people during your day so you’re balanced.

Tip #5 Know when to say no. It’s easy to take on too much when you’re building a business. Remember there are people out there to help you. Whether you turn to friends and family to help, you turn down some opportunities that don’t work 100% for you or you outsource some tasks, it’s important to not overload.

It is possible to have your cake and eat it too. You can have a happy marriage and a successful business. Set priorities, balance your time, and learn to be in the moment.

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It’s really not a mystery how people become a success.  They provide something of value.  All too often on the sites many of us frequent, such as Twitter, I find the majority of users thinking that if they just get their spammy message in front of enough people, the numbers dictate they will eventually get rich.

This is simply not true.

What these people are showing us, is that the only value they have to give is spam.  Links from strangers who we don’t know or trust telling us to do something we don’t know why we should want to do in the first place… is pointless and disgusting.  Ick.

Now, I’m sure these people do have actual value to give somewhere inside them – but just don’t know how to convey it.  So, we’re going to start small with some tips.  Future articles will definitely build further on this topic, as it’s becoming more and more necessary to get the message of value out there.

1.) Focus.
How many people do you know – especially on Twitter – who have a few hundred people following them, but are following 2,000 themselves?  This tells me one thing right away – they click ‘follow’ on everyone’s profile, in hopes that they will get some reciprocal or auto follows.  This is how many of the Twitter auto-spam scripts work.  It also tells me they are interested, not in people, but in scamming someone.  Whether this is the intent or not, it’s the message they’re sending.

So, your rule for following people should be: ONLY follow people YOU are interested in learning from.  If that’s only 30 people, then that’s all you follow.  You may have hundreds of followers by using tricks, but none of them are actually interested in anything you have to say so all of your scam effort has been useless.  As far as the content of your posts, your rule can be: would YOU follow YOU?

2.) Have Patience.

Social media marketing, whether on Twitter or otherwise, should be treated just as marketing and networking in the real world – with patience and persistance.  Building a smaller organic list of followers – who actually care about you and what you have to say is far more valuable than hundreds of followers who simply auto-follow everyone that follows them.

Having patience with this process is key.  By providing value to your followers, you’ll recieve mentions on other people’s posts – which in turn, build your followers naturally.

3.) Give.

All-too-often online marketers do only one thing: ask for something.  Click this link, come and follow me, visit my blog, buy my product, etc.  No one, I repeat, NO ONE is intersted in listening to someone they don’t know, trust, or respect.

By all means, share a useful link.  Re-quote a mindful thought you heard or read. Give a short tip about your expertise, or give away an entire product.  Giving is the only thing the Universe accepts as paymet for all it’s done for you – and will do for you.  Give, and you will recieve goodness back 10-fold.

The caveat to giving is that it must be done with the recipient’s best interest in mind.  For example, if you’re giving only to get something back – that’s not really giving – that’s a scam.  This isn’t easy if you’re not used to it and it may take an entire shift in the way you think, but figuring out how to make this little change in the way you do things day-to-day can impact your life forever.

In summary, your only focus online (and in “real” life for that matter) should be to give all you can.  Provide true value to your network and that network will support and sustain you through the thick and the thin.

How do YOU provide value?

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Unlock Your Social Potential

A socially-empowered person achieves so much greatness, basically because of the people that catapult him to success. He earns the trust and all-out support of the people, whom he had helped before. He never runs out of help. He can do anything with the plethora of people behind him. All because he knows he maximizes his social potential!

See, if you know your social skills and you make use of them, you will reach self-empowerment. Self-empowerment is making a general overhaul in your life and turning yourself into a happier and more successful person.If you can be one of those people-persons, then I can’t see any reason why you will not succeed. You just have to know how to start.

1. Be genuine.

Hypocrisy will just bring you all the way down. Be genuinely nice and interested to people. Once they perceive that you are Mr. Hypocrite with selfish intentions, you might as well say goodbye to self-empowerment.

2. Be the greatest listener that you can be.

To earn the love and trust of the people, listen to their problems and sympathize with them. Do not just hear them out, listen to them with your heart. Make eye contact when the person talks to you. Listen as if every word matters, and it does. Brownie points when they find out that there is a confidante in you.

3. Laugh out loud.

I do not mean that you force yourself to laugh for every joke cracked by someone, albeit you do not find it funny at all.This means finding humor in things and not being too darn serious. A person oozing with an awesome sense of humor attracts crowds and eventually, attracts success.

4. Don’t forget yourself.

In the process of fluttering around like a social butterfly, you might forget yourself, allowing everyone to push you over. Remember, love and value yourself before anyone else. If you deem yourself respectable and worthy of affection, people will flock to you and not trample on you.

5. Do random acts of kindness.

You don’t have to do a John Rockefeller and blow your savings to charity. Little acts of kindness matters the most, and this can be as simple as giving someone a surprise you-take-care card or helping an elderly cross the street. When we were kindergarten students, kindness was taught to us and greatly practiced. Now is the time to revive the good deeds and this time, let them stay for good.

6. Contact your old friends.

Sad how some friendships are destined to goodbye, but thanks to technology, you can do something about it. Relive the good old days by flipping your yearbook and look for the great people whom you want to communicate with again. Adding these old friends to your roster of support peers will surely make you feel good all over.

7. Develop your personality.

Are you grouchy, grumpy and generally morose? Whoa, you can’t go through life with those. Get rid of the bad traits and habits that perpetually hamper your growth. And really, who wants a grouchy friend anyway?

8. Be confident.

Be able to stride to the other corner of the room and introduce yourself to people with that winning smile of yours. Just remember: be confident, not arrogant.

9. Practice control.

When angry, don’t snap at anyone. Never throw a tantrum. Stay calm and collected. Be adult enough to take control of situation and transform your anger into something more productive and passive. As soon as people think your anger goes to volcanic proportions easily, they will find it hard to come to you.

10. Keep nurturing your relationships.

Your relationship with your family, friends and significant others is too precious that you must not neglect it whatever happens. Go out and have fun with them. Do things together. Happiness will never fly from your side as long as the people who matter the most are close to you.

In the end, using people for self-empowerment means becoming a better and more lovable person. It’s a win-win situation: the people know they can turn to you anytime and vice versa.

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Meeting people can be difficult for some.   Even outgoing people sometimes struggle with what to say to someone when you meet them.  Last week, Scott Young wrote about simply saying ‘Hi’ to people… anyone, really.  This is great advice when taken to heart.

I’d like to dive into a few things you can say to anyone, pretty much anywhere.  The key to any of this is to practice.  Like anything else you might have some fear in doing – it won’t go away without working at it.  Something you can try before you actually do it in real life, is to do it in a mental practice – simply envision yourself in a situation you find yourself in frequently (in line at Starbucks) and then picture yourself saying one of the phrases below.

Remember, people like to talk about themselves (yes, everyone).  Most people are also uncomfortable talking to strangers.  So what we need to do, while taking these two things into consideration, is get them talking about themselves while at the same time dropping their guard.

Hi!
Hi by itself can be uncomfortable… many times, the person you’re saying hi to will say hi back, and then you’re back to square one.  What we need are conversation starters.

The complement: “Nice boots, are those snake skin?”
Seriously, in a past sales job I had in Los Angeles, this sentence was used as a dramatic example of how to get someone talking.  You can replace either part of the sentence, obviously.  If I like someones jacket, I might say, “I really like that jacket, where did you get it?”  Easy.

The share-alike: “Ah, I love tea too, have you tried the London fog?”
If you’re somewhere that it’s not invasive to over-hear someone (like them placing their order at a coffee shop), relate to them about their drink choice.  You’ve automatically broken the ice and have a conversation started.

The follow-up: “It was nice meeting you, are you on Twitter/Facebook?”
Depending on the person and feel you get from them, you’ll typically know after the first sentence if you care to talk to them further.  You have to assume the only way that will happen is if you ASK.  If you’re in a crowd that might be typical Twitter or Facebook users, you can use that line.  You can simply ask for a web site or email too.  Or, have some business cards, or mini-cards, printed up and tell them to check out your blog if they have time.   “I’d love to hear from you what you think about my site” is a very easy way to turn a passer-by into a contact.

Long-term, I like to acquire people’s mailing address and birthday to send them greeting cards (yes, I do this – and yes, you can send me your address and birthday and you’ll get a card, too!).  If you don’t send cards, simple emails and messages on Facebook to let someone know you’re thinking of them is a powerful way to maintain and build that relationship.

Now that you have a few different things to say to someone you meet for the first time, let me know in the comments if you have any stories about meeting (or not meeting) a stranger, or if you have any other greetings you’d like to share!

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Making the decision to have a baby could be the most important decision you ever make. The decision should be based on responsibility, maturity, a loving marriage, and the ability to make sacrifices.

No one should ever go into being a parent half-heartedly. Children must be an all-or-nothing decision and if you aren’t sure you are ready, please give it some thought first.

But, if you are in a loving, committed relationship and think you are ready to have a child together, here are some things to consider before you make that final decision:

1.    What kinds of sacrifices are you willing to make to be able to afford having a baby?
Babies and children have needs that can be expensive? Are you financially prepared for a baby at this time in your life?

2.    Is your marriage strong enough to withstand the stress of rearing children?
Raising a child can put added stress on a marriage. Make sure you and your partner are both committed 100% to this idea and to each other.

3.    Will you put parenting first?
Are you a giver or a taker? Your baby will need you to give your all and then some, especially in the beginning.

4.    Are you a good example?
Are you someone you child could look up to? Do you exude respect and responsibility?

5.    Can you discipline with a loving heart?
Discipline is so important to raising a child. Decide how you wish to approach discipline before you have to give it?

6.    Do you own a home?
This is something to consider. If you are not in a financial position to own your own home are you in a financial position to have a child?  Maybe you are choosing to rent or have not made the leap, but it may also be because your financial world is a mess.  Make sure you know before you leap into parenthood.

7.    Do you have reliable incomes?
Unless you have a steady income, you might want to think again. A child needs to be raised in a home with financial security because a lack of financial security leads to stress.

8.    Are you a positive people?
Will you be raising your child in a positive, loving environment?

9.    Is adoption an option?
If you can’t have children of your own, would you be willing to raise one who needs a loving set of parents? Could you raise someone else’s child?

10.    Is there something about you that makes you believe you will be a great parent?

Are you loving and tender? Caring and thoughtful?

11.    Is there something about you that makes you think you might struggle as a parent?
Each of us has our negative points and no one is a perfect parent.  Be aware of the negative aspects of your personality and how you cope with the world because you might pass these on to your child.

12.    Are you ready for children?
This is the big one, are you ready? Have you really taken the time to fully understand the responsibilities involved in raising a child and a family?

It is important to fully understand all the consequences and responsibilities involved with having a child.  When you are able to do this, you run a better chance of bringing a happy healthy child into this world.
And a lot more love.

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Does a Law on Human Attraction Exist?

“Opposites attract” is a law of attraction, at least where electromagnetism is concerned. But are there laws about attraction between two people? “In a world that is full of strangers” as a line in a famous song of the 1980’s goes, is there a clear set of rules that allows two people to fall for each other?

Is attraction a matter of chemistry?

Maybe. According to scientists, the attraction between animals of the opposite sex is all about chemicals called pheromones. The effect of pheromones in behavior of insects is the most studied to date. It has been observed, at least in some experiments, that pheromones are responsible for communication among same species and colony of ants. The horrible odor released by skunks to ward off enemies is said to be a kind of pheromone. Some species of apes rub pheromone-containing urine on the feet of potential mates to attract them. Some scientists believe that animals (usually the females) such as insects and mammals send out these chemical signals to tell the male of their species that their genes are different from theirs. This gene diversity is important in producing offspring with better chances of survival. The perfume industry has capitalized on pheromones as a means to increase one’s sexual attractiveness to the opposite sex. Animals such as the whale and the musk deer were hunted down for these chemicals.

Lately, scientists are looking into the existence of human pheromones and its role in mate selection. There are many conflicting views in the realm of biology, chemistry, genetics, and psychology. Most scientists would assert that these do not exist, or if they do, do not play a role in sexual attraction between a man and a woman. But new researches such as that conducted by Swiss researchers from the University of Bern led by Klaus Wedekind are slowly making these scientists rethink their stand. Their experiment involved women sniffing the cotton shirts of different men during their ovulation period. It was found out that women prefer the smell of men’s shirts that were genetically different, but also shared similarities with the women’s genes. This, like in the case of insects and other mammals, was to ensure better and healthier characteristics for their future children. But researchers also cautioned that preference for a male odor is affected by the women’s ovulation period, the food that men eat, perfumes and other scented body products, and the use of contraceptive pills.

Does personality figure in sexual attraction?

Yes, but so does your perception of a potential mate’s personality. According to a research conducted by Klohnen, E.C., & S. Luo in 2003 on interpersonal attraction and personality, a person’s sense of self-security and at least the person’s perception of his/her partner were found to be strong determinants of attraction in hypothetical situations. What does this tell us? We prefer a certain personality type, which attracts you to a person. But aside from the actual personality of the person, which can only be verified through close interaction through time, it is your perception of your potential partner that attracts you to him/her, whether the person of your affection truly has that kind of personality or not. This could probably account for a statement commonly heard from men and women on their failed relationships: “I thought he/she was this kind of person.”

So how does attraction figure in relationships?

You have probably heard that attraction is a prelude, or a factor towards a relationship. Most probably, at least in the beginning; but attraction alone cannot make a relationship work. It is that attraction that makes you notice a person from the opposite sex, but once you get to know the person more, attraction is just one consideration. Shared values, dreams, and passions become more significant in long-term relationships.

So should I stop trying to become attractive?

More than trying to become physically attractive, work on all aspects of your health: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. Physical attraction is still a precursor. Remember, biology predisposes us to choose the partner with the healthiest genes. Where your emotions are concerned, just ask this to yourself: would you want to spend time with a person who feels insecure about him/herself? Probably not! There is wisdom in knowing yourself: who you are, your beliefs, values, and dreams. And do not pretend to be someone you are not. Fooling another person by making him/her think that you share the same values and beliefs is only going to cause you both disappointments. When you are healthy in all aspects, attractiveness becomes a consequence and not an end. As mentioned in the Klohnen and Luo’s research, a person’s sense of self-security matters, perhaps even beyond attraction. But remember: do these things for yourself and not for other people. Only then can you truly harness your attractiveness as a person.

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I am going to ask you to something very weird right now. First of all, I want you to listen to your thoughts. Now tell me, what thoughts fill your head? Would you label them as positive, or negative?

Now let’s say you are walking down the street with these thoughts. Do you think anyone who would meet you would be able to tell you what’s on your mind?

The answer to number one is up to you. But, the answer number two can be pretty generic. Although people will not be able to tell you exactly what you think, they will more or less have an idea of how you are feeling.

Here’s another question. When you enter a party filled with friends, do they all fall silent as if something terrible had happened? Or does everybody there perk up as if waiting for something exciting to happen?

You know what? The answer to all these depends on your frame of mind.

Thoughts are very powerful. They affect your general attitude. The attitude you carry reflects on your appearance, too – unless, of course, you are a great actor.

And it doesn’t end there. Your attitude can also affect people around you.

The type of attitude you carry depends on you. It can be either positive or negative.

Positive thoughts have a filling effect. They are admittedly invigorating. Plus, the people around the person carrying positive thoughts are usually energized by this type of attitude.

Negative thoughts on the other hand have a sapping effect on other people. Aside from making you look gloomy and sad, negative thoughts can turn a festive gathering into a funeral wake.

A positive attitude attracts people, while a negative attitude repels them. People tend to shy away from those who carry a negative attitude.

We can also define attitude as the way of looking at the world. If you choose to focus on the negative things in the world, more or less you have a negative attitude brewing up. However, if you choose to focus on the positive things, you are more likely carry a positive attitude.

You have much to gain from a very positive attitude. For one, studies have shown that a positive attitude promotes better health. Those with this kind of attitude also have more friends. projecting a positive attitude also helps one to handle stress and problems better than those who have a negative attitude.

A positive attitude begins with a healthy self-image. If you will love the way you are and are satisfied, confident, and self-assured, you also make others are around feel the same way.

A negative attitude, on the other hand, has, of course, an opposite effect. So, carrying a negative attitude has a twofold drawback. You feel bad about yourself, and you make others feel the same way.

If you want to have a positive attitude, you have to feature healthy thoughts. This is probably very hard to do nowadays since, all around us, the media feeds us nothing but negative thoughts. A study shows that for every 14 things a parent says to his or her child, only one is positive. This is truly a saddening thought.

If you want a healthier outlook in life, you need to think happy thoughts, and you have to hear positive things as well. So, what can you do? Well, for starters, you could see a funny movie, you could play with children, spend some time telling jokes with friends. All these activities fill you with positive stimuli, which in turn promotes positive attitude.

Although it is impossible to keep ourselves from the negative things around us, you can still carry a positive attitude by focusing on the good things, the positive things in life.

And this positive attitude you now carry can be of benefit to other people. Sometimes when other people feel down, the thing people mostly do is try to give them advice. But sometimes, all they need is somebody to sit by them, and listen to them. If you have a positive attitude you may be able to cheer them up without even having to say anything.

If positive attitude is really great, why do people choose to adopt a negative attitude instead? One who carries a negative attitude may be actually sending a signal for attention. Before you get me wrong, feeling sad, angry, or gloomy is not wrong itself. But dwelling on these thoughts for far too long is not healthy either. There is a time to mourn.

As always, if you are beset by troubles, even in your darkest hour, focus on the good things in life, you will always have hope. Problems become something you can overcome.

You do not have much to lose by adopting a healthy, positive attitude. Studies show that such an attitude actually retards aging, makes you healthier, helps you develop a better stress coping mechanism, and has a very positive effect on all the people you meet every day. So, what’s not to like about a positive attitude? Adopt one today.

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When you hear the word “coach”, what comes first into your mind? Do you picture a basketball team with a man/woman shouting out directions? Or perhaps a football team with a man/woman pacing to and fro and calling out the names of the players?

Coaching is no longer reserved to sports teams; it is now one of the key concepts in leadership and management. Why is coaching popular?

Coaching levels the playing field.

Coaching is one of the six emotional leadership styles proposed by Daniel Goleman. Moreover, it is a behavior or role that leaders enforce in the context of situational leadership. As a leadership style, coaching is used when the members of a group or team are competent and motivated, but do not have an idea of the long-term goals of an organization. This involves two levels of coaching: team and individual. Team coaching makes members work together. In a group of individuals, not everyone may have nor share the same level of competence and commitment to a goal. A group may be a mix of highly competent and moderately competent members with varying levels of commitment. These differences can cause friction among the members. The coaching leader helps the members level their expectations. Also, the coaching leader manages differing perspectives so that the common goal succeeds over personal goals and interests. In a big organization, leaders need to align the staffs’ personal values and goals with that of the organization so that long-term directions can be pursued.

Coaching builds up confidence and competence.

Individual coaching is an example of situational leadership at work. It aims to mentor one-on-one building up the confidence of members by affirming good performance during regular feedbacks; and increase competence by helping the member assess his/her strengths and weaknesses towards career planning and professional development. Depending on the individual’s level of competence and commitment, a leader may exercise more coaching behavior for the less-experienced members. Usually, this happens in the case of new staffs. The direct supervisor gives more defined tasks and holds regular feedbacks for the new staff, and gradually lessens the amount of coaching, directing, and supporting roles to favor delegating as competence and confidence increase.

Coaching promotes individual and team excellence.

Excellence is a product of habitual good practice. The regularity of meetings and constructive feedback is important in establishing habits. Members catch the habit of constantly assessing themselves for their strengths and areas for improvement that they themselves perceive what knowledge, skills, and attitudes they need to acquire to attain team goals. In the process, they attain individually excellence as well. An example is in the case of a musical orchestra: each member plays a different instrument. In order to achieve harmony of music from the different instrument, members will polish their part in the piece, aside from practicing as an ensemble. Consequently, they improve individually as an instrument player.

Coaching develops high commitment to common goals.

A coaching leader balances the attainment of immediate targets with long-term goals towards the vision of an organization. As mentioned earlier, with the alignment of personal goals with organizational or team goals, personal interests are kept in check. By constantly communicating the vision through formal and informal conversations, the members are inspired and motivated. Setting short-term team goals aligned with organizational goals; and making an action plan to attain these goals can help sustain the increased motivation and commitment to common goals of the members.

Coaching produces valuable leaders.

Leadership by example is important in coaching. A coaching leader loses credibility when he/she cannot practice what he/she preaches. This means that a coaching leader should be well organized, highly competent is his/her field, communicates openly and encourages feedback, and has a clear idea of the organization’s vision-mission-goals. By vicarious and purposive learning, members catch the same good practices and attitudes from the coaching leader, turning them into coaching leaders themselves. If a member experiences good coaching, he/she is most likely to do the same things when entrusted with formal leadership roles.

Some words of caution though: coaching is just one of the styles of leadership. It can be done in combination with the other five emotional leadership styles depending on the profile of the emerging team. Moreover, coaching as a leadership style requires that you are physically, emotionally, and mentally fit most of the time since it involves two levels of coaching: individual and team. Your members expect you to be the last one to give up or bail out in any situation especially during times of crises. A coaching leader must be conscious that coaching entails investing time on each individual, and on the whole team. Moreover, that the responsibilities are greater since while you are coaching members, you are also developing future coaches as well.

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Empower Your Communication

There is so much to know about conversation that anyone, even I, could ever realize. You can go though watching talk shows; radio programs; clubs dedicated to public speaking; ordinary conversations; certain rules still apply when it comes to interaction through words. It may sound tedious, I know, but even though it’s your mouth that’s doing the work, your brain works twice as hard to churn out a lot of things you know. So what better way to start learning to be an effective communication is to know the very person closest to you: yourself.

1. What you know.
Education is all about learning the basics, but to be an effective speaker is to practice what you’ve learned. My stint as guest at every Toastmasters’ meeting I go to taught me that we all have our limitations, but that doesn’t mean we can’t learn to keep up and share what we know.

2. Listening.
It’s just as important as asking questions. Sometimes listening to the sound of our own voice can teach us to be a little bit confident with ourselves and to say the things we believe in with conviction.

3. Humility
We all make mistakes, and sometimes we tend to slur our words, stutter, and probably mispronounce certain words even though we know what it means, but rarely use it only to impress listeners. So in a group, don’t be afraid to ask if you’re saying the right word properly and if they’re unsure about it then make a joke out of it. I promise you it’ll make everyone laugh and you can get away with it as well.

4. Eye Contact
There’s a lot to say when it comes to directing your attention to your audience with an eye-catching gaze. It’s important that you keep your focus when talking to a large group in a meeting or a gathering, even though he or she may be gorgeous.

5. Kidding around
A little bit of humor can do wonders to lift the tension, or worse boredom when making your speech. That way, you’ll get the attention of the majority of the crowd and they’ll feel that you’re just as approachable, and as human to those who listen.

6. Be like the rest of them
Interaction is all about mingling with other people. You’ll get a lot of ideas, as well as knowing what people make them as they are.

7. Me, Myself, and I
Admit it, there are times you sing to yourself in the shower. I know I do! Listening to the sound of your own voice while you practice your speech in front of a mirror can help correct the stress areas of your pitch. And while you’re at it you can spruce up as well.

8. With a smile
A smile says it all much like eye contact. There’s no point on grimacing or frowning in a meeting or a gathering, unless it’s a wake. You can better express what you’re saying when you smile.

9. A Role Model
There must be at least one or two people in your life you have listened to when they’re at a public gathering or maybe at church. Sure they read their lines, but taking a mental note of how they emphasize what they say can help you once you take center stage.

10. Preparation
Make the best out of preparation rather than just scribbling notes and often in a hurried panic. Some people like to write things down on index cards, while other resort to being a little more silly as they look at their notes written on the palm of their hand (not for clammy hands, please). Just be comfortable with what you know since you enjoy your work.

And that about wraps it up. These suggestions are rather amateurish in edgewise, but I’ve learned to empower myself when it comes to public or private speaking and it never hurts to be with people to listen how they make conversations and meetings far more enjoyable as well as educational.

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